Dear Diary I am addicted to chugar.....

Yeah I LOVE SUGAR!  It's like Paula Deen's obsession with butter, I love sugar.  I need something sweet or something bready (which has sugars in it too gosh darnit!).  I am trying to be healthy and I am reading more books about PCOS.  Breads and sugars are what I need to either control my portions or not eat them at all.  Okay stop there, me not eating bread is like asking people not to breath, its not happening.  I probably should switch to a gluten free sugar free diet but cardboard doesn't taste well.  If you don't believe me check out what I made with beautiful yeast and sugars and flours

Pretzles are yummy for my tummy and turrible for my thighs! 

Paula Deen's Buttery Buttermilk Biscuits

And now I can't fit in my pants....

Dear Diary my husband should win an award!

For cooking the fattiest things on earth.  So we fell off the wagon but this week I went to the grocery story and got healthy things for us to cook and snack on.  I bought the essentials.  Well Jonathan and his brother, Anthony, decided to hang out today and that entailed cooking lunch.  Keep in mind I had healthy food in the fridge.  Here is how it all went down:

Anthony-"It's my birthday dude and I want for my dinner a hot dog wrapped in bacon battered and deep fried"

Jonathan-"Naw Man that is not good trust me I have had it (yes he has folks!) What's better is just a bacon wrapped hot dog in a bolillo (not a Caucasian) and you fry in oil in an iron skillet."

They go to Krogers to get the ingredients of course and history was made.  So the Fartello Dog was created and the recipe goes as follows:
2 slices of bacon wrapped around Nathan's Famous Hot Dogs, the long ones
Fry them in oil to a nice crispy bacon finish
Place artery hardening hot dog in the bolillo and garnish with chili garlic sauce, mustard and Italian blend cheese and that my friend is a Fartello Dog.    Also what has to be mentioned is that Jonathan ate 4 of these puppies, yes after his brother pussed out and could only eat 2 instead of the 3 he requested.  Then Jonthan went into an artery clogging coma for 4 hours. Try it if you want to have heart disease for life.  Feast your eyes below for Jonathan's Masterpiece:

The Fartello Dog available at select locations

Dear Diary WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THIS!!!!!!!

As you all know I love Paula Deen, yes even though her meals are saturated with fatty goodness, she makes my day brighter with "Hey Y'all!"  Well I stumbled upon this open letter to Paula Deen from another blog and they made either the greatest or grossest tribute pie to Ms. Deen.  Check out: An Open Letter to Paula Deen

I am not condoning this recipe but I still am jealous that they thought of this.  One day I will meet you Ms. Deen and we will eat our deep fried butter balls and deep fried chicken pot pies with some Mint Juleps.

Dear Diary Because I am not Fat Enough

And now another thing to add to the website thisiswhyyourefat.com.  I was just reading huffingtonpost.com before I went to bed and saw this

Yes DiGiorno not only has frozen pizza but it has packaged with it cookies, not only that it comes with boneless "Wyngz" too.  Really "Wyngz" that tells me its probably right up there as a chicken mcnugget made with "chyken."  Well to be fair they are nestle toll house cookies which are delicious but still that is too much fatness all around.  And they wonder why obesity is rising. (Don't judge me when you see me at HEB pulling it out of the freezer section because you will be there for the same reason.)